I decided I needed to get back to focusing on the outcome I want to see. I learned the term "NED" which is an acronym used by doctors for No Further Evidence of Disease. This is what I will see in a few short months after I've had my treatment. I can see it.
I've been hooked on a support group website where there are hundreds of stories like mine, and it brings me comfort to see how many people have marched through this diagnosis and came out the other side feeling a new sense of purpose and are enjoying life to the fullest. I think this is what I needed. I want to hear from others who have been through this. I want to ask questions that doctors can't answer. I want to see that many have gone before me and it's not as bad as the stories we make up in our minds.
If you want to read some amazing stories or have questions, you should check it out ... it's also a place for friends and family to find support: https://www.jostrust.org.uk/ - there is a link to the forum at the top of the page.
Other than waking up at 3am for the past few nights, and not being able to get back to sleep, a "new" normal has set in. For the most part, I am still working, and trying to live each day like I was before. Of course my thoughts stray thousands of times a day, and I remember... but for the moments of reprieve, I am so grateful.
Most of my emotions are attached to sentimental thoughts of how this is affecting my friends and family. I am less worried about myself. I can handle this, and once I know more information on treatment and options, I will just take it day by day. Worry and fear don't help anything, and as long as I can continue to push those thoughts aside, I will be fine. I am surrounded by nothing but help, love, and support. I feel I am one of the lucky ones! There is light at the end of this tunnel.
I've been hooked on a support group website where there are hundreds of stories like mine, and it brings me comfort to see how many people have marched through this diagnosis and came out the other side feeling a new sense of purpose and are enjoying life to the fullest. I think this is what I needed. I want to hear from others who have been through this. I want to ask questions that doctors can't answer. I want to see that many have gone before me and it's not as bad as the stories we make up in our minds.
If you want to read some amazing stories or have questions, you should check it out ... it's also a place for friends and family to find support: https://www.jostrust.org.uk/ - there is a link to the forum at the top of the page.
Other than waking up at 3am for the past few nights, and not being able to get back to sleep, a "new" normal has set in. For the most part, I am still working, and trying to live each day like I was before. Of course my thoughts stray thousands of times a day, and I remember... but for the moments of reprieve, I am so grateful.
Most of my emotions are attached to sentimental thoughts of how this is affecting my friends and family. I am less worried about myself. I can handle this, and once I know more information on treatment and options, I will just take it day by day. Worry and fear don't help anything, and as long as I can continue to push those thoughts aside, I will be fine. I am surrounded by nothing but help, love, and support. I feel I am one of the lucky ones! There is light at the end of this tunnel.
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